SOMETIMES..

Ignorance is bliss..I am just ranting but sometimes knowing something is even worse because it simply eats your heart away. One bite at a time.

Because I am now aware of certain things that were said and done, I will never be able to do certain things for you or say certain things to you because I feel like it's not "special" anymore - it's been done.

I also don't want to remind you of everything she's done for you...it just kills me because I can't be myself...

She was the love of your life and your true love, wasn't she? She was the girl for you, wasn't she? She was everything you ever wanted, and you said you will always love her. And that, I know, still is a well kept promise. It's one that will never, ever change.

Perhaps I'm a masochist, but this pain keeps my optimistic self in check with reality. I don't know why I constantly do this to beat myself with all these information, it's sickening really. But I am only trying to protect myself because I am so tired of getting fucked over....

Would you trust yourself if you were in my position? Would you trust me if you read the fb conversation about waiting for girls to grace your hotel room?